Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
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