You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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