I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
