That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
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