I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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