I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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