i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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