yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
jump out the window naked night went bad
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
