i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
I just gift wrapped bread.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
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