pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
operation have a gay friend backfired
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
