yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
