last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Randomize
