In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
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