We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
