I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I supernannyed him into submission
Randomize
