when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize