There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Randomize