you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Randomize
