I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Randomize
