Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize