I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
i've created a new STD.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
True strength comes from lack of pants
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Congratulations! We have a period
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
