I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
