just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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