Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Randomize
