It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
All the doctor said was why
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
