she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
do nipples grow back?
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