I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Randomize
