to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Say something about gay babies.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
