You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Randomize
