you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
