He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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