Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
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