There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Randomize
