butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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