why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
