Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
