hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Randomize
