i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
