Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
Randomize
