I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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