You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
