I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Blood and glitter go together right?
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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