If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Randomize
