I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I'm at about main and main street
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
