Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
