separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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