I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Randomize
