so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
