so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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