The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
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