Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
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