woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
